Something about LIFE: Marriage

So last night I had a deep conversation with my mother. We talked everything about life, and it lasted for an hour and a half. And last night I decided to tell my mother something I haven't told her for the last 2 years (or more maybe) about my love life and my friendship. Why I haven't told her anything about me in the past 2 years? I don't know, I am just afraid if she thinks that her daughter is not "baik-baik saja" with her friends, or it's just me who cannot explain how my life goes outside.

Friends, having a deep conversation with your mother will cure your heartbreaks and also make you learn something about life. And for me, in this quarter life crisis, I think that marriage is the best problem-solving. A perfect husband will make my life complete and I won't have any burden like this. BUT NO FRIENDS, I've just changed my mind...

And I'm not gonna tell you about the "enak-enak", but I want you to think about your future marriage life.

This is a question I always think about lately,

WHAT IS THE MARRIAGE FOR?

In religion point of view, in this case, Islam, you do marriage for completing a half of your imaan. OK. You do marriage for prohibiting zina. OK. You do marriage because you've planned your future perfect family. OK... But wait

Most of the people dream their wedding dreams, but somehow they just didn't prepare THE REAL LIFE AFTER MARRIAGE. They want to marry because they want to fulfill their desire or they just want to... I think it is the main reason why many couples are getting divorced nowadays.

They declare their love too early and do not understand how love works after saying I Do. One thing my friends, one thing, MARRIAGE IS NOT ONLY ABOUT HAVING AN AMAZING PARTY DECORATIONS AND BEAUTIFUL BRIDESMAIDS IN THE PHOTO AS PUBLISHED IN SOCIAL MEDIA.

Life after marriage is more than having a beautiful photo of a baby with her/his Ma and Pa as it spreading in social media.

Life after marriage is more than having a beautiful photoshoot.

Life after marriage is more than having an expensive honeymoon to Maldives.

Life after marriage is more than saying I LOVE YOU & I DO.

There are many things to be prepared to build a family which lasts into Jannah, my friends. Please check your 'niat' before you say you want to marry, please don't married if you just want to follow the trends.

I suggest to ask yourself about these questions before saying that you want to marry:

1. WHAT KIND OF PERSON YOU WANT TO MARRY?

2. WHAT TO PREPARE IF YOU WANT TO MARRY?

3. WHY IS MARRIED IMPORTANT?

If you already have the answers, ask your heart once again, pray to Allah many times, do I really ready to complete a half of my imaan? If YES, then CONGRATULATIONS!

You may really ready to marry someone whose name is written in Lauhul Mahfudz besides your name :)

I'm not being "sok tau", but I just want to tell you, please do not marry because of trends. As we see, there are A LOT OF MARRIED YOUNG COUPLES PUBLISHED IN SOCIAL MEDIA. And I believe it once triggered you to follow their step to marry, ya gak? Honestly, YES, I myself want to marry as soon as possible, but then I think about the real life after marriage. I heard and learned a lot how life after marriage looks like from elder people. Then I try to change my mind, "it does not that simple".

Now, before you decided to marry, ayo menyibukkan diri untuk introspeksi. Memperbaiki diri, memperbaiki niat dulu sebelum kita benar-benar siap untuk bilang bahwa kita ingin menikah. :)


Dari aku seseorang yang juga galau menunggu seseorang,
Jika kita berjodoh pasti Allah dekatkan :)

A Self Reflection Post #4 : Who Do You Think You Are?

We often think that we cannot become someone we always want to be.

There is a sentence that I take it for granted before. Then I realize how does it mean when I heard this words as the opening line from the CEO of KitaBisa.com, "Apalah aku yang cuma remah-remah rempeyek" or "Apalah aku yang cuma butiran debu". I see how words really matter when I know the power within the words itself. Yes, Mas Timmy makes me realized that sometimes when we say this words, unconsciously, we underestimate ourselves. As long as we believe that we are nothing, then that is the time we wasted our chances.

Who says that we cannot be someone who we always dreaming of?

Dear you, you can be whoever who want to be. Dream higher. Believe in yourself. And focus on becoming the person you always really want to meet.

A Self-Reflection #3: Being Nice to People

One of the keys to happiness is to be a nice person. Whatever we get in reverse, being a nice person is a must. But sometimes life is so tough until it makes us think that we do not deserve happiness and we start thinking that "why we must be nice while they cannot do it in reverse?"
That's true, being a nice person is exhausting when you hope that everyone also nice to you. I mean, if you are nice because you want them to do the same, you will never get what you want.
Do not stop my darling, being a nice people do not need a special requirement, being a nice people is a relief for our soul.
When they cannot be as nice as you, or even mean, they try to say:

Even though they do not nice, at least you are the one who can inspire them to always be nice. Do not be afraid, "The world is full of nice people. If you cannot find one, BE ONE".

Love,

IPS